honey I have been where you are b4. I have been very much in love and had my husband cheat on me while pregnant. I understand your disappointment, crushed heart and distrust of him. You can't help your reactions to his decision. But with work it can be better. Have you got a marriage councelor or pastor that you can both talk to you? I would have a tough time brushing it all under the rug. Myself, in counceling it would be discussed and delt with as it should be. Of course your husband doesn't want to here anything else about it! So do children when they are caught doing something wrong.....you have my support and my prayers during this stressful time!

Thank you. We have not sought counseling simply because we can't afford it (we have no insurance). I have tried to see how far we can get ourselves before deciding to pursue outside help. I've been researching on sites and reading forum posts and posting on my blog and reading books to get help with this, but it is hard finding much about how to really deal with the anger.

honey I have been where you are b4. I have been very much in love and had my husband cheat on me while pregnant. I understand your disappointment, crushed heart and distrust of him. You can't help your reactions to his decision. But with work it can be better. Have you got a marriage councelor or pastor that you can both talk to you? I would have a tough time brushing it all under the rug. Myself, in counceling it would be discussed and delt with as it should be. Of course your husband doesn't want to here anything else about it! So do children when they are caught doing something wrong.....you have my support and my prayers during this stressful time!

i feel for you. my wife started her affair after sexting my sister's husband. she claims they always had a connection and after 13 years of not giving in to temptation she decided to.

she wanted to feel desired in a "different" way...and so it began.

i admit we had drifted apart, and fell into the normal husband and wife routine when you are married a long time...and when you don't talk about things it makes things worse.

after it all came out we entered therapy, discovered that she had bp and anxiety disorder and that our communication issue was a long time in the making...and that our parents struggles with marital infidelity likely had an impact on how we saw husband and wife roles...ok...

but WE did start talking about the affair more. i asked her some of the toughest questions i have ever had to ask. and she answered them. it was tough to hear the details...but you know it would have been worse on me if i never would have asked and been making up the details in my head.

i read somewhere that the reason for this is when we are traumatized our mind is trying to recover by reconciling what we KNOW happened with what we THINK happened. so if you have questions that don't get answered or that get evasive, incomplete or fuzzy answers then THAT sets us back even further.

i would also like to mention i never cheated on her...given how my father treated my mom. i saw what it did to my mom.

take care...